I am in LOVE

I am in Love

Yes this is true, I am in LOVE!

I returned yesterday from the wild and beautiful India. Each trip back home is healing and I always come back renewed and nourished. This recent trip of 7 days has been life changing.

I left for India to keep a promise I made to my little nephew when he was born in Sep 2014. When I left home last year I promised him that I would return to celebrate his first birthday.  Little did I know that his birthday would change my life in such a profound way.

When I caught that flight to India two weeks back, I was proud that I chose to keep a promise that I had made to a toddler who may not remember anything.

Why did this make me proud?

In this fast paced 3 dimension world, many of us go about pursuing material things and pleasures most of which come at a cost to our health, well being and at the cost of our families. One of our god given pool of nourishment comes from our families. Those that are married or live with their partners, parents or children, I am sure can vouch for this.

After a hard days work, few moments with our loved ones is all we need to recoup, nourish and renew ourselves.

I chose to leave my family in India and come to Australia about 11 years back in pursuit of a better standard of living, better job and more money. I found everything that I sought in Australia; great job, money, friends and a superior standard of living.  What I had not asked for and what I had not prepared to receive in addition to this, is the awakening, the healing and the transformation here on this old sacred land.

On my way home from the airport yesterday, my eyes were filled with tears and I had a feeling of not knowing where I was and what I was doing here in Melbourne.  What was I waiting for Who was I waiting for? I brushed it off at first as usual feelings of confusion that one experiences travelling through different time zones.  Over all this confusion, a conversation I had with my brother in law kept coming back to me.

Before leaving India I had in my brashness asked him if he and my sister, his wife would consider moving to Australia. His response I will never forget; he said “what good is money if I am not with my family and loved ones. My parents are old and they need me and I want to be there for them when they grow old. I am a simple man and I am happy with all that I have”.

Even after all that I know, I assumed that he also wanted what I had sought 11 years ago when moving to this country. I was deeply moved by his words. I realised then how much in love I am with my family and how much I miss them.

I deliberately use the words “In Love” rather than just “love”. The reason for this is over the years especially when I started this spiritual journey, I looked deeply into the relationships I had with members of my family; mother, sister, grand mother, father, aunties. Each time I went home, many illusions were shattered and truth was revealed whether I liked it or not. There were times when I could not bear to be in some of their company. Ultimately though our bond was cleansed of all that was false, all that was fearful and what was left was true love, light and truth.

Most of these relationships have been re established, healed and renewed now. Some of them I have let go. 

I have fallen in love all over again with my country, with my culture, with my home and upbringing, with my family.

So what is so special about this birthday that I had mentioned at the start of this post?

Firstly, on the birth date, my brother in law drove us to a temple in a village few hours outside of Bangalore. As you can see in the pictures below, it is the only temple on this planet with over 900,000 Shiva Lingas. The little black statues/sculptures that dot the landscape are called Shiva Linga. It is the symbolic representation of Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvathi, also known as Shiva and Shakti. The phallus shaped top and the round womb shaped bottom is the embodiment of Tantra, the divine feminine and masculine, of life, creation and birth.

Over 900,000 Shiva Lingas!!

Over 900,000 Shiva Lingas!!

Selfie with Shiva Lingas :P

Selfie with Shiva Lingas :P

Standing amidst so many Shiva Lingas is so powerful. There could not be a louder message from the universe that a divinely guided new beginning had begun for all of us present at the temple that day.

Secondly, My sister Shruthi decided that the birthday will be celebrated in a way that is more meaningful to her son, to the family and to the community. Whilst I was aware of her intentions, I wasn’t prepared for the impact of her actions and the planned celebration.

Over the next few days Shruthi and I visited orphanages and homes for children. Her plan was to throw a party for children who had never had their birthdays celebrated before. We set out to find a home, an organization were our celebration and contribution would be welcome and were its impact would be maximum.  There were many to choose from, yet there were few that welcomed this opportunity. This came as a surprise to us, we did not loose hope we continued to search.

Finally days before my departure we found the Ashadeep home. Children and girls at this home, aged between 4 and 20 years were found orphaned or abandoned on the streets. They were rescued by Child Welfare Services and brought to homes like Ashadeep that provide treatment, food, shelter and education for these brave souls.

When we walked into Ashadeep and spoke to Sister Lucy who was in charge of this home, we knew we had found our destination. Everything about this place, from the nuns who had dedicated their life in service of these children, to the little classrooms and the children themselves warmed our hearts; the energy here was so divine, gentle and soothing.

Over the next few days we prepared for the celebration. It was not only the celebration of our little Khush, it became the celebration of all the children at Ashadeep. On the day, we decorated the basement of Ashadeep with balloons, bright lights and confetti. There was a magic show, a Dj, tattoo artist, an MC to host several games and a fashion show in which we all participated along with the children.

 Children getting tattoos in colour :)

 Children getting tattoos in colour :)

I have never danced as happily and wildly as I did at this party. I was lost in the sweet embrace and healing hugs of these children who had lost so much yet had the fullest heart, brimming with love and gratitude.

Here’s a 30 sec video of the children dancing, singing and playing. In this video amongst all the gorgeous children you will also see two tall, wild, happy slightly older children…. their names are Deepthi and Shruthi ;)

Contribution was made on behalf of Divya Amin and our customers too. Children enjoyed a yummy meal, chocolates and sweets. We also donated school books, sanitary napkins, hair clips, slippers and shoes to the children.

Now tell me? How does one remain the same after experiencing such happiness, love and surrender?

Everywhere I look I see the beautiful faces of these young beings healing, ready to be empowered and be the generation that is our tomorrow.

I am proud and grateful to my sister Shruthi and her husband Shiv who created this opportunity of enlightenment and celebration of life.

I left India that night knowing that this is only the beginning.  I left feeling the deepest gratitude and love for the young ones and for Ashadeep for this life changing experience.

I pledge a partnership with Ashadeep and other homes like them.

I am Awake, I am Alive, I am in Love

Where do I go from here?

Is it time to return home?

Where is home?

Several unanswered questions.....answers come as I let go of this waiting. The waiting that I have been on for the last 2 years

Deepthi